Living with challenging family circumstances has been described as ‘living with an elephant in the room’where everyone pretends it is not there and no one wants to talk about it (Kroll, 2004). In contrast, and set within wider discussions on children and young people’s participation, it is often assumed that children and young people want, need and have the skills and increasingly the opportunities to talk about their lives (see Chapter Seven in this volume). Here we consider how they wish–or not–to talk about personal ‘stuff’and the implications for policies and practices designed to support them. Participation is a broad and complex theme, as the previous two chapters have discussed, and encompasses how children and young people are consulted on issues of concern to them, how they are listened too, as well as how they choose to express their views, or not. In this chapter we focus primarily on voice. Ideas about talking and listening are embedded in debates about children and young people’s rights, particularly their autonomy and welfare rights to participate, have a voice and share their experiences. Indeed, participation is frequently heralded as the gold standard of research, policies and practices concerned with childhood. Despite the widespread discourse of participation, very little is actually known about the lived experiences of children and young people living with a loved one who is seriously ill. The limited research that is available